Back from the Vegas trip and found this beautiful glass pendant made with Pepe's ashes by Psyche Cremation Jewelry. My boyfriend sent me a picture but to see it in my eyes and in my hands was different again. It is so beautiful as he was. It changes color depending on the angle. It's kind of like Pepe went back to universe. So so beautiful. Now I have something to wear on me everyday that I can be physically together with him all the time. I am so glad my boyfriend found this company for me. I came home to a really warm feeling... as if Pepe was saying "Welcome home from a crazy Vegas trip! I hope you had lots of fun to forget all the pain! " :)
I haven't posted anything for a while. I kept myself busy. After v-day, my friend came to stay with me for a few days from LA. It was great to have someone with me because my boy was gone to Cali. One night I woke up in extreme loneliness (I don't know why) and kind of freaked out because I realized that the bed was just me, no Pepe, no boyfriend. And I realized I had someone in the other room. A moving creature...lol so it was nice to have her stay with me.
She took off to go to Japan one morning and I went to Vegas that night with another friend of mine. I was gonna keep myself occupied during this time so it was great to travel to Vegas. The first day I saw my boyfriend there. It was a strange complexed feeling because if it wasn't for Pepe, we would not be traveling to (well, not at the same time but...) mainland together or spend time together in mainland. We would often travel to inter island because we were able to travel with Pepe, but not mainland.
I didn't think about Pepe's loss too much while I was in Vegas. I mean I did... but not too much. I was not around dogs much there, and there was nothing to remind me of him there. My pendant wasn't ready. But I don't think Pepe would have wanted to hang out with me at the club dancing with me either lol.
I was on a flight back to Honolulu and couldn't sleep at all. I could never sleep on the plane. So I was looking at the pictures of Pepe and was starting to get sad thinking Pepe won't be there at home waiting for me. He is always home waiting for me and get so excited when he sees me. His tail wagging goes crazy and he starts to pant because he starts hyperventilating out of excitement.
Well, none of that happened. But it was like the pendant was it for me this time. He wasn't physically there waiting for me but he picked the perfect timing for the pendant to get delivered.
I miss him horribly. It's been a little over 1 month since he's gone. But these days I can live with the happy memory we shared. And I speak of him as he is still alive. Because he is still alive in my heart and soul.
And because he is still alive in spirit, I made this customized M&M chocolate at M&M factory in Vegas. It has Pepe, me and my boyfriend's name. Even though Pepe wasn't allowed to eat chocolate (cuz he is a dog), now it doesn't matter. I am going to put this up for his little temple I made for him by the side of my bed.
Pepe. I miss you so much.