Happy Valentine's day... a day to celebrate love. Since I am all by myself without my boyfriend and Pepe, I decided to do all the things I want to do to pamper myself today. True love starts from within! So I opened his urn, grabbed his ashes and took off to a trail called Makapuu Trail. I was originally thinking about going to Diamondhead because Pepe loved it so much. But today being Valentine's day or just being Sunday, the parking lot was full and I couldn't go inside. So I took off to Hawaii Kai side for this beautiful trail which is the one I wanted to go on my birthday. Since I didn't get to go to any trail because Pepe was sick, it was great that I got to do this today.
I put his can of ashes in my bagpack and just kept on going. I saw wild whales jumping in and out of the ocean. It was just a gorgeous day with some nice breeze. I enjoy working out these days and enjoy going on different trails. But recent years, Pepe would pant so much under the heat so I couldn't really bring him to these hot places. I knew he didn't actually enjoy going to the ocean either, so today it was great for both of us because he got to sit in my bagpack and I did not have to worry about him with all that much direct sun.
It was so bizarre. I was listening to music on my iphone and just hit random play. When I got to the top of it, the song " I'll be missing you' by Puff Daddy & Faith Evans came on. This is a song that kept playing on my boyfriend's radio in his car after he passed away. He let me listen to it and I cried. That song came on at such a perfect timing and I thought it was another sign that Pepe was sending me saying, "thank you mama. it's beautiful here. "
I made sure today was a day to be good to myself. I didn't go out to eat fancy dinner or lunch or didn't see any of my friends, but I was just fine being alone with Pepe in my heart. I took him to see Diamond head during sunset since I didn't get to take him to the real Diamondhead today. Just as I sat down on his favorite bench (or his spot) my phone rang and it was my boyfriend.
I looked up and saw clouds forming like this dog (side face) was kissing another person. I'd like to think he had a good day today. Even though we are physically not together, I hope he enjoyed hanging out with me today.
This is only last year when we gave him cookies from Petco and made him a heart shaped steak dinner.
It's hard because unlike other dogs, he didn't show me much physical sign of getting weaker. I mean his legs were giving out and he was sleeping a lot recently. But he was cute and looked like a puppy til the day he died. But I think he really meant to keep it that way, for my memory of Pepe to be as cute as he is forever.
Even though my boyfriend is having a great time eating in and out burger and yummy mexican food in California, I think I had a decent Valentine's day all by myself. Pepe is still with me in my heart and in my memory.
Happy Valentine's day Pepe! You are truly the love of my life!